Don't you just hate it when you're talking to someone and they seem like a generally nice person, but you don't want to be next to them because they're breath STINKS? Thank goodness they invented gum. Otherwise, I don't know how I, and many others, would survive. Gum is a lifesaver in any situation, whether it's you who has the bad breath, or you're buddy talking to you. Bad breath is inevitable, unless you want to stay away from some of the best foods on the planet, of course. It's a good thing we can rely on gum to come to the rescue!
One of my favorite gums is Eclipse, specifically the winterfrost flavor. Out of all the gums to ever exist, and there are many, I chose Eclipse. I ask myself now, why is that? What did those advertisers do to make me love this gum more than any others?
First of all, Eclipse gum can KILL germs. How cool is that? When I read this, I picture tiny little cinnamon toast crunch characters with swords attacking all the germs in my mouth. This weasel word of "kill" evades explaining how this gum is truly effective and instead makes me picture little armies of cereal characters. If I weren't attempting to break down this ad, I would be fine with my imaginary soldiers, as I was back before Critical Thinking. Now I see that in reality, Eclipse is just using the word "kill" because they can't think of a better way to explain their product, and because the word "kill" really reinforces the fact that it will get rid of that stink everyones dreads. In other words, this ad is just a big lie, because in reality, this gum is not going to kill anything.
The word "kill" is also used in just about every sentence except for the last, which is the advertising technique of repetition. Another advertising technique used is Glittering Generalities. If you chew this gum, the results will be fantastic. You'll have super advanced fresh breath. Seriously. What does advanced fresh breath smell like, anyways?
On the topic of confusing words, this ad has got some vagueness in it. The words natural and advanced have got some major vagueness. Natural has a positive connotation, and that's why they used it, but what is natural? It could mean that it is organic, that it is something not made by man, and many other possibilities, which could also tie in to ambiguity. Advanced is also a very vague word. It has a positive connotation as well, but what does it really mean? Many people have different ideas of what advanced is. Also, how can fresh breath be advanced? I really hope no one was persuaded by this ad, all this vagueness and nonsense makes it unbelievable.
Well, I've definitely learned a lot about my favorite gum. I don't know if I can call it that anymore, though, because there is a lot of shakiness in its claims. Clarification is required if this ad is to be convincing. There are too many words I just don't understand in this ad. Whether or not they're vague or weasel words, this ad is getting less convincing by the second. Oh well, it's still gum, something we're all in desperate need of many times. The Eclipse ad may be obscuring the truth about what it really does to make that stinky breath go away, but hey, as long as it's eclipse-ing that bad breath, it's all good, right?
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